Tag: influence

How to Be a Better Leader by Communicating More Assertively

Lead with Clarity. Lead with Conviction. Lead with Intent.

Leadership often fails not because of strategy or talent, but because the message never lands with the force it needs. People follow direction only when they understand it, trust it, and feel the confidence behind it. That is the real work of assertive communication. It sits between silence and force. It allows you to say what needs to be said with clarity, with steadiness, and with respect.

Assertiveness is not volume. It is not dominance. It is the ability to speak with a clear mind, a steady tone, and a firm sense of what matters. When you communicate this way, people understand your expectations, your standards, and your priorities. They know you are present. They know you are intentional. They know you are accountable.

The Development of assertive leadership through stages such as passive communication, clear expression, and fostering openness.

Assertiveness is not pushing harder. It is removing ambiguity. It is raising the standard.

The most effective leaders do three things consistently.

They speak with clarity instead of uncertainty.
They give direct feedback instead of indirect hints.
They set boundaries that protect focus instead of allowing everything to expand by default.

Clarity gives people direction.
Direct feedback gives them improvement.
Boundaries give them confidence in what matters.

You do not need aggressive language to lead with authority. You need structure in your thinking, simplicity in your message, and conviction in your delivery.

Assertiveness is learned. It is practiced. It is earned.

Great communicators prepare before the moment. They decide the outcome they want. They sharpen the point they need to make. They remove the noise that usually dilutes the message.

Three practices elevate this skill.

First, define your objective before you speak. If the goal is unclear, the message will drift.
Second, use clear first person language. This creates accountability and reduces defensiveness.
Third, evaluate yourself after every important exchange. The small corrections compound into mastery.

Assertiveness is not a personality trait. It is a discipline that strengthens with repetition. It reshapes your posture, your tone, your timing. It shifts how the room responds to you.

The payoff is not personal confidence. The payoff is organizational clarity.

When a leader speaks with conviction, three things happen.

People know what to do.
People know why it matters.
People know how their work connects to the mission.

This reduces conflict, accelerates decisions, and builds a culture where direction is consistent. Teams stop guessing. Meetings move faster. Feedback becomes normal. Accountability feels natural rather than punitive.

Assertive communication is not a stylistic choice. It is a leadership requirement. It turns complexity into direction. It turns hesitation into momentum. It turns effort into results.

Clarity builds trust.
Conviction builds credibility.
Intent builds alignment.

That is the work. That is the standard. That is the path forward.

The Ben Franklin Effect

“He that has once done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another, than he whom you yourself have obliged.” – Benjamin Franklin

The Ben Franklin Effect, a psychological phenomenon named after the famous American founding father, offers a surprising and counterintuitive approach to winning people over and advancing your career. As Franklin’s quote suggests, asking someone for a favor can be more effective in gaining their support than doing them a favor first.

The Ben Franklin Effect

Imagine your career as a rocket ship, ready to launch into the stratosphere of success. Just as a rocket needs a launch pad and boosters to propel it skyward, your career needs the support and mentorship of influential people to reach new heights. But how do you gain their favor and turn critics into allies?

The person who receives the most favors is the one who knows how to return them.

Thiruman Archunan

The key lies in the Ben Franklin Effect. By strategically asking for favors from the right people, you create cognitive dissonance in their minds. They subconsciously justify their actions by believing they must like you, otherwise they wouldn’t have done you the favor. This subtle shift in their perception can transform indifferent or even adversarial colleagues into supportive allies.

To apply this effect to your career advancement, start by building genuine relationships and seeking small favors, such as asking for advice or recommendations. As you progress, look for opportunities to collaborate on high-visibility projects or gain introductions to key stakeholders. Remember, the goal is not to manipulate others, but to create mutually beneficial relationships that help you grow and succeed.

The successful networkers I know, the ones receiving tons of referrals and feeling truly happy about themselves, continually put the other person’s needs ahead of their own.

Bob Burg

As you navigate the corporate landscape, remember that the Ben Franklin Effect is just one tool in your career advancement toolkit. It requires tact, timing, and a focus on building authentic connections. By combining this strategy with a genuine desire to help others and provide value, you’ll create a powerful network of supporters who will champion your success.

Consider the story of Michael, a talented VP of Operations who aspired to become the company’s next Chief Operating Officer (COO). He knew that to reach this goal, he needed the support of the current COO, Lisa, a renowned industry leader known for her strategic insights and influential network. However, Lisa had little reason to notice Michael, let alone champion his career growth.

Instead of trying to impress Lisa with his achievements or doing her unsolicited favors, Michael decided to apply the Ben Franklin Effect. He approached Lisa after a board meeting and asked if she could recommend any leadership development programs or executive coaching resources that had been instrumental in her own career journey. Lisa, flattered by the request, shared her experiences and offered to connect Michael with her own executive coach.

That simple favor request sparked a mentoring relationship that accelerated Michael’s path to the C-suite. Lisa began to see Michael as a high-potential leader and took him under her wing. She provided guidance, shared invaluable insights, and even advocated for his promotion to COO when she decided to step down. By asking for that initial favor, Michael had turned a distant executive into a committed sponsor who played a pivotal role in his ascent to the C-suite.

“The successful networkers I know, the ones receiving tons of referrals and feeling truly happy about themselves, continually put the other person’s needs ahead of their own.” – Bob Burg

As you navigate the path to executive leadership, remember that the Ben Franklin Effect is just one tool in your career advancement toolkit. It requires tact, timing, and a focus on building authentic connections. By combining this strategy with a genuine desire to help others and provide value, you’ll create a powerful network of supporters who will champion your success.

So, take a lesson from one of history’s most influential figures and start turning critics into allies, one favor at a time. As you do, you’ll unlock new opportunities, gain valuable mentorship, and propel your career to new heights. The sky’s the limit when you harness the surprising power of the Ben Franklin Effect.